The time has come for a revolution.For far too long, a faction of our society has been discriminated against, ridiculed for their differences and heralded as “dangerous” by a populace afraid of change. But now, the silent are being given a voice.They said our sights were set too high. They said this country was too divided, too disillusioned to ever come together around a common purpose. But at this defining moment in history, Americans have done what the cynics said we couldn’t do.It is time to celebrate that classiest of facial accoutrements — the mustache. The American Mustache Institute aims to do just that.”AMI is the only facial hair think tank and advocacy organization in the world which has fought against a long pattern of prejudice against the Mustached American community since its secret formation in the 1960s,” according to their Web site. “In the 1990s, AMI went public and began putting on events known as ‘Stache Bash in St. Louis, home of the world’s largest mustache — the Gateway Arch.”AMI recently announced the exciting news that they will present the first ever “Robert Goulet Memorial Mustached American of the Year” award, recognizing the most impactful mustached American of the past year.AMI stresses this isn’t a best mustache contest, but rather about finding the mustached American who has best distinguished themselves in their given field.AMI listed the 16 nominees on their Web site, and voting is open to the public through Oct. 17. The winner will be announced at the annual ‘Stache Bash on Oct. 25.I encourage everyone to make their voice heard by casting a vote in this historic ‘stache race.The nominees come from a variety of backgrounds including a U.S. Army Sergeant, two-time World Series champion Keith Hernandez, former Washington Redskins wide receiver Art Monk, “The Insider” anchor Pat O’Brien, Libertarian Party presidential nominee Bob Barr and a guy named Gar who bears an uncanny resemblance to Robert Goulet.Perhaps the most controversial nominee is Cleveland Brown, best known for being the friend and neighbor of Peter Griffin on the popular FOX show “Family Guy.”Brown is, of course, animated. But the AMI sees this bold nomination as a turning point.”As both an African American and being of Mustached American descent — all of his life Cleveland has suffered through the harsh discrimination one faces as a double minority,” the AMI said on its Web site.The AMI cites Brown’s negotiating with FOX to receive his own show as proof of his power as a mustached American.”His celebrity, bravery, and willingness to work with FOX to achieve his goals clearly make him a qualified candidate,” the AMI said.The winner of the “Robert Goulet Memorial Mustached American of the Year” award is determined by popular vote. Show your faith in the democratic process by voting for the candidate of your choice. And remember not to vote solely on the beauty of a particular ‘stache, but to also look at the qualifications behind it.I also encourage people to take part in ‘Stache Bash 2008. Held in the great mustache city of St. Louis, it benefits Challenger Baseball, a baseball league for children and adults with disabilities.It is wonderful to see people using the ‘stache for good.The mustache has a long and celebrated history around the world, and even here at LSU.Former chancellor Sean O’Keefe was the proud owner of a tremendous ‘stache. It was his bold committal to mustache rights that inspired the creation of the Mustache Advocacy Network, the University’s Flagship mustache organization.According to their Facebook group, MAN uses the mustache “as a tool to inspire sweeping social changes and to help eradicate social injustices, such as the persecution of the mustachioed of society, among many, many other things.”MAN has tentatively scheduled its annual mustache celebration, Mustache Friday Extravaganza, for April 10.While AMI is on the right track for integrating the mustache into mainstream culture, they are still a fringe group. It will take much more before the mustache is socially accepted. The mustache has long been discriminated against for its connections to child molesters and Adolf Hitler. This distrust of mustaches has permeated every facet of our society and is evident in the fact that only four presidents have ever worn mustaches. The last mustachioed president was William Howard Taft who left office in 1913. Bob Barr is the first mustached presidential candidate since Thomas E. Dewey in 1948.Perhaps the most victimized faction of the mustached Americans is the mustached woman. These women often have trouble finding dates or careers outside of waste disposal.But change is coming.The mustache is making a comeback. Actor George Clooney was recently spotted sporting a ‘stache. High profile ‘staches like his can change popular opinion about a fuzzy upper lip.And so I challenge Sens. Barack Obama and John McCain to cross party lines and unite on this one important issue. I want to see both presidential candidates join with Barr in sporting a mustache. It would shed much needed light on this devastating prejudice.Because we are not a collection of red states and blue states, mustachioed states and clean-shaven states. And in this moment, in this election, we are ready to believe again.—-Contact Caitlyn Scott at [email protected]
American Mustache Institute sheds light on minority
October 12, 2008