As college students, one of our biggest worries coming to school is finding the right roommate. We fear having a roommate we think is strange, while some of us embrace the idea of making new friends.
Those who have that fear often decide to room with a friend as a safety net, but living with a friend may be the worst possible option.
The problem with sharing space with the homies is that we room with them because we know a few of their good qualities. Maybe they’re nice, clean or savvy in the kitchen, but that doesn’t qualify them to be the perfect roommate.
One of the first things to think about when living with a friend is how they kept their room at their previous home. A few trips to their house should tell you all you need to know about their cleanliness. If your future roommate has clothes all over their room, how do you think they’ll be when they’re on their own?
Also, don’t fall for that “it was a rough week” excuse. That week can turn into a semester really quickly. If you’re okay with finding five-day-old chicken in your microwave or the slow creep of your friend’s clothes onto spaces they don’t belong, then you’re braver than me and can stop reading now.
Another factor to consider: that friend’s attitude when asked to do a certain task. Part of life is doing things we don’t want to. How can we live with someone who throws a fit when it’s their turn to wash the dishes?
Communication is vital to any relationship, including one between roommates. A roommate should be someone to whom we can say more than “hi” and “bye”. Living with someone we can talk to about our lives creates a healthy relationship. Roommates should be able to talk civilly if something bothers them without making the situation hostile.
For example, one of my roommates told me he would be passing through our apartment to drop off a package while on his way to New Orleans with some work friends.
I went out of town for the weekend, and he failed to tell me that they would drink copious amounts of alcohol and trash our apartment. I must’ve missed the message that those same friends — who I’ve never met — would be sleeping in my bed, showering in my bathroom and using my towels and blankets. It was all right because I enjoyed cleaning my apartment for five hours and explaining to the management that I wasn’t the one shooting bottle rockets from our balcony.
The college experience helps a person learn a lot about themselves and the people with whom they associate. I wouldn’t say that everyone changes in college, but we become more comfortable with who we are.
We get the chance to join student organizations, get a job or study abroad while working toward our degrees. These experiences change our perspective on life and provide new friends and opportunities. Friends tend to drift apart at this point, and instead of understanding the situation, they can become bitter and hard to each other. Instead of being happy for one another, we find ourselves upset that we’re losing a friend.
Making a decision on who to room with depends on how well one person knows the other, but more importantly how well a person knows themselves. I’ve seen friendships crash and burn when two or three friends live together.
During my freshman year, I met two girls who graduated from the same high school and decided to live together. One girl rushed while another got a job off campus. Slowly, they began to talk less and less, and they ended their friendship in a huge dispute at the end of the semester over a small miscommunication. The next semester, the two girls moved out of the residence hall and haven’t spoken since.
One of my closest friends would annoy me if we lived together. We’d also never get anything done. We’re saving our friendship and college careers by not living together.
If you prefer to live with a friend, make sure it’s either a close friend whose bad habits you’re aware of and comfortable with or a distant friend who you can deal with losing or possibly grow closer to. Things can change once a person is seen in their best and worst moments. As a roommate, be prepared for both.
Joshua Jackson is a 20-year-old theatre junior from New Orleans.

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Roommates