The Guinness World Records announced recently that next year’s edition, the 60th anniversary of the first book, will feature a host of strange new records including longest tongue and tallest male teen. We asked our columnists:
What record would you like Guinness to introduce so you could break it?
SidneyRose Reynen
Our Lady of Angst
Does the Guinness Book of World Records have any qualitative traits? Like best eyebrows, perhaps? I would definitely be a contender for that one.
Jose Bastidas
No Way Jose
I watched “Jump In!” recently and, while I will never be able to double-dutch effectively because coordination is not my forte, I would totally try to break the jump rope world record. Even if I don’t break it, I have been jumping rope with my sister since I was born, so I’ll look great doing it. Wish me luck everybody.
Ryan Monk
The Amazing Cynic
I would like to be considered for world’s least attractive face. Because I mean, come on. Look at me.
Shirin Chowdhury
The Taming of the Shirin
If there were a way I could measure all the copious amounts of ice cream I’ve eaten in my lifetime, I’m pretty confident in saying I’d have you all beat. I take my frozen-treat servings very seriously.
Jana King
Off With Her Head
If there’s one thing I know how to do, it’s type on a keyboard. I’ve been typing since I could sit at a desktop. I could definitely be the world’s fastest typer.
Ryan McGehee
Brace Yourself
I think I could be the most procrastination-prone college student. A term paper is a guarantee of an all nighter right before it’s due.
Taylor Simien
Say It Loud
I’d like to be considered for how many times I can go over my cell phone data allowance in a month, since the wi-fi connection in my apartment sucks. Thanks LSU.
Justin Stafford
Blue Collar Scholar
I enjoy buying tailored suits, shirts and unique ties. Typically, a fashion taste like this would drain one’s checkbook. That is unless one could acquire these items for really cheap. I buy most almost all of my clothing from Goodwill or off a clearance rack. With that said, I would like to set the record for most amount of money saved while buying designer clothing secondhand or at a reduced price. It’d be a 24-hour shopping spree. The purchase price would be compared to the suggested retail price and the savings would be calculated from that. I’d argue that the savings would be thousands. Any challengers?