’Twas the Friday before finals week, when all through campus, every creature was studying and posting #finalsweek selfies to Instagram.
I don’t need to speak of the numerous joys that finals week brings. It’s the most anticipated week of the semester, more exciting than Mardi Gras and Spring Break combined. The mere thought of bubbling in all of those Scantrons brings a smile to every University student’s face.
I mean, how could you not love finals week? There are so many great characters that come out of the woodwork during the next couple of days.
What about Guy Who Walks in One Hour Late to His 7:30am Final? He knows he screwed up, and so does the rest of the class. The pitiful look on his face is complemented by the bags under his eyes that scream, “I really shouldn’t have gone to Tigerland last night.”
Or how about Girl Who Emails Entire Class Begging for Notes? She’s my favorite. Don’t we all love being asked to provide help to someone who put in no effort at all to come to class and take their own notes?
I have to give honorable mention to the classmates that respond to the initial email by clicking “Reply All.” The “Reply All” function really shines when discussing lame excuses for not coming to class when said class has 300-plus students.
To those “Reply All” clickers out there, I thank you for including me in a conversation that I have absolutely nothing to do with. I love being along for the ride!
Finals week is essentially Midterms Week: The Sequel, so there are many returning characters from the original.
There’s always Guy Who Hasn’t Been to Class Since the Midterm! He’s probably the fan favorite here. The professor’s reaction is always priceless. The “Sorry, what’s your name again?” followed by the silent recognition of their name from the roll that the student never signed is an excellent moment to witness.
Speaking of professors, they aren’t excluded from the fun romp that is finals week. Teachers are often the most entertaining at this time of the year.
We’ve all had Young Instructor Who Makes His Exams Painfully Hard to Prove He’s the Real Deal. I get it — they don’t want to be seen as the 20-something pushover who will drink beers with you after class. They’re big boy professors now!
Or how about Professor Who Hasn’t Updated Moodle Since the Midterm? You had an A two months ago, but what about now? When will she update the attendance record? Is she even going to grade that paper you gave her after Fall Break? I guess drama and anticipation is just another part of the college experience.
And much like midterms, finals create so much excitement in students that sometimes we forget to study! Of course, when students forget to study, that means only one thing can happen — academic honesty.
But obviously none of Louisiana’s best and brightest students would ever think of cheating. Not even in this age of cellphones and saving mathematical formulas on your graphing calculator would an LSU student commit academic dishonesty. After all, students are only forced to cheat if they’re stressed out.
But as we all know, finals week is the least stressful week of the year. It’s like a final farewell to the sleeping idiots in the back of the class, the annoying overachievers in the front, and the strangers you haven’t seen since the first week.
So long, my fellow hungover tigers! Finals week is coming, and most of us won’t survive.
SidneyRose Reynen is a 19-year-old film and media arts sophomore from New Orleans. You can reach her on Twitter @sidneyrose_TDR.