Finish the game before the rain? Check. Both quarterbacks look like superstars? Check. Avoid injuries? Check.
That’s not LSU coach Les Miles’ exact checklist from Saturday’s National L-Club Spring Game, but it’s got to be close.
This column is supposed to be about my takes from the game, but I don’t have any. I alluded to such in my “Three Up, Three Down” column from Saturday.
Pinning the first team offense and defense against the reserves made for an incredible blowout.
This game was a nonsensical scrimmage. One person in the press box compared it to watching the Green Bay Packers play a college team. I couldn’t agree more.
After the third or fourth possession, I was ready to leave. Hats off to those of you who stayed for the whole game without being required to do so. You earned a purple and gold medal because you have to be the biggest Tigers fans out there.
For those of you who missed the barnburner, the White Team — also known as the starters — throttled the Purple Team composed of mostly second and third string players. If LSU can play each team’s reserves this fall, it will go undefeated and bring home the program’s first national title since 2007.
Unfortunately for the Tigers, that won’t happen.
Nobody learned anything about LSU yesterday, and that’s what Miles wanted. College football coaches are constantly guarding their team’s secrets like they are nuclear launch codes.
It’s the reason we won’t find out who the starting quarterback is until the day before the first game. Brandon Harris and Anthony Jennings will probably split snaps in that game to ensure Mississippi State won’t know what to expect in the second game.
If it was up to Miles, the spring game probably wouldn’t exist.
I’m right there with him after yesterday.
It wasn’t the team’s first scrimmage, so it doesn’t hold any significance to the football team. It doesn’t draw anywhere near the 100,000 people Tiger Stadium can hold or even the 99,000 that showed up to Ohio State’s spring game this year.
After minutes of careful thought, here’s what I came up with to replace the current spring game.
First, the game could have two captains, preferably players in a position battle, who pick their teams similarly to the NFL Pro Bowl. Don’t you think 99,000 people would show up to watch Team Harris take on Team Jennings? That would at least be intriguing.
My favorite idea is a gigantic Big Cat drill tournament. Miles loves him some Big Cat, and so do the fans. It’s just two players using raw strength to be manlier than the other. It’s the modern day version of jousting or gladiator fights.
Miles could put every player in a giant bracket, each matchup can go head-to-head at the 50-yard line and Miles could pick the winner of each competition. The overall winner gets a trophy. It would be a great watch.
It’s highly unlikely to happen, but so is entertainment from a starters-against-backups game.
Brian Pellerin is a 21-year-old mass communication junior from Kenner, Louisiana. You can reach him on Twitter @Pellerin_TDR.