Who the f— is in charge of New York City’s public schools?
It’s understandable to censor a sentence like the previous one, but what about children’s standardized tests?
The Department of Education has taken political correctness to an entirely new and absurd level – references to “dinosaurs”, “birthdays” and “Halloween” will not be seen on NYC’s standardized tests.
Alluding to these topics has been deemed potentially offensive to children belonging to certain groups. For example, a reference to dinosaurs would upset any idiot who is dumb enough not to believe in dinosaurs.
We have fossils. Dinosaurs were here and they’re awesome. Accept it.
Mentioning birthdays could be offensive to Jehovah’s Witnesses, who do not celebrate them. Birthdays will now be referred to as the day your father accepted stretch marks as a fact of life.
References to wealth and poverty are outlawed because they could make children jealous and more likely to rob and physically assault their fellow classmates.
The Department of Education insists this is not censorship, but rather a regular change in language undertaken by the publisher.
Regardless of who is responsible, I think we can all agree this is overkill.
Public institutions are often too politically correct, and concern about offending a small minority has suddenly made non-offensive words offensive.
A reference to a birthday has never been a middle finger to Jehovah’s Witnesses. It’s just something about 99.9 percent of us celebrate, so we talk about it.
Halloween is the same story. Anyone who is even the slightest bit fun celebrates Halloween, and 99.9 percent of Americans like to have fun.
Quoting “Jurassic Park” was never meant to offend anybody dumb enough not to believe in dinosaurs. It’s a great movie, and about 99.9 percent of Americans have seen it.
Fact check me, I dare you. Everything is 99.9 percent.
Tests were never offensive. In the past, they may have recognized differences in culture by alluding to Christmas, Kwanzaa, Halloween or birthdays.
Tests may have included questions regarding one individual having more money than another, but this was never to offend the poor or alienate the rich. It was done to teach kids how to add and subtract.
We are actively trying to make our society as uniform as possible by masking our differences instead of celebrating them.
In the real world, people are different. In the real world, people celebrate Christmas, Halloween, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Easter, birthdays and many other holidays.
So why do we avoid teaching our youth about topics they will undoubtedly face as adults? Are we educating kids more by not teaching them about important aspects of American culture?
Any parents who would be offended by a reference to any one of these topics need to have a long, hard look at themselves. Hiding cultures from America’s children when they are young could cause them to be distrustful of those cultures as adults.
We are all unique – why should we hide it?
Parker Cramer is a 21-year-old political science junior from Houston. Follow him on Twitter @TDR_pcramer.
 
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Contact Parker Cramer at [email protected]