Al Gore’s environmentalist movement has been an overall positive addition to our modern society, and environmentalism has been taken to extremes. Humanity as the cause or major contributor to the current trend of climate change has become a religion. In listening to the “Revelations” of Gore and other climatology alarmists, I have learned their 10 commandments:
1) “I am Al Gore. I used to be the next president of the United States of America.” According to Rep. Ed Markey, D-Mass., Gore is a prophet. In fact, he is the great prophet of the man-made global warming crisis. You shall heed no authority above him.
2) You shall not worship any unrenewable energy sources. Oil resources will not last forever. True, there’s lots of oil waiting to be tapped in Alaska and along our coastline, but if we allowed oil companies to drill there, then oil reserves would last longer and gas prices would drop. That is unacceptable. We should move to renewable and “reliable” resources like wind and solar energy. (Nuclear energy? What’s that?)
3) You shall not criticize Al Gore for any hypocrisy in his ministries of the “green” gospel. The prophet Al Gore (peace be upon him) is spreading the gospel of the climate crisis, and if you think he doesn’t practice what he preaches, keep your slander to yourself. He is not a hypocrite for asking you to give up your SUV even though he flies around in his private jet or criticizes the president’s environmental policies while his own home creates far more pollutants than Bush’s Crawford, Texas ranch.
4) Remember Earth Day, and keep it green. Earth Day was that fun day back in grade school when classes were canceled in favor of various fun activities. Earth Day is April 22 and celebrates our Mother Earth through small children planting saplings at school while their older siblings protest on the Washington Mall. April 22 is also the birthday of Lenin, but environmentalists are not communists.
5) Honor thy Mother Earth – buy carbon credits. You can pay money to companies like PLANKTOS so they can go out and offset your carbon footprint sins by planting plankton in the ocean to process more carbon dioxide. This is nothing like plenary indulgences of medieval Christianity, and anyone who makes the connection is slanderous.
6) You shall not go hunting or eat the flesh of other animals. Animals are people, too. It is murder.
7) You shall not vote Republican. Every time you vote Republican, President Bush kills a baby seal.
8) You shall not “greenwash.” Greenwashing is the belief that buying allegedly “green” products is all that is necessary to do one’s part for the environment. Wrong. Saving the environment requires sacrifice and commitment. Repent from your ways and be reborn.
9) You shall not bear questions about “the consensus.” There is no debating Al Gore (peace be upon him). The debate is over, and everyone who disagrees with the conclusion conveniently missed it. There is consensus in the climatologist community, and there is not one dissenter. Dissenters do not exist, and any “scientist” who questions human causation of climate change is a quack.
10) You shall not covet the luxuries of modern civilization. Do not allow yourself to be tempted by the comfort and safety of the large gas-guzzlers like a mid-sized sedan. Your Geo is all you will ever need, and don’t be discouraged if you’re being passed up by the joggers along Nicholson.
The global warming crisis really is a religion. It has a great founder in a prophet like Christianity’s Christ, Buddhism’s Buddha and Zoroastrianism’s Zoroaster. Its primary message is one of repentance for sins, and it has an Armageddon scenario to scare people into believing them. Rather than burn for eternity in the “Lake of Fire” found in the Christian book of Revelations, Gore claims that sinners will all drown in the flood of melting ice caps. Remember what Gore said when he accepted his Oscar, “Global Warming is not a political issue; it is a moral issue.” Science does not deal in the realm of morality.
I am not saying the science behind this current crisis in climate change is false or purposefully distorted by the scientists themselves, but I do question their ability to forecast trends of epic climate changes on a long-term scale with only a short-term period of data. Louisiana has not been hit by a hurricane since Rita in 2005. What happened to the doom and gloom Al Gore prophesied?
—-Contact Michael Schouest at [email protected]