One of the few reality TV shows I watch is “Toddlers & Tiaras.” There is something grotesquely fabulous about tiny children, usually girls, prancing around in tacky, thousand-dollar outfits, fake hair and fake teeth.There are essentially two reasons I watch pageant shows. A former prissy little girl myself, I empathize with the few girls who genuinely love having their hair and makeup done and wearing sparkly dresses. But I also take some sick pleasure in harshly judging the parents and grandparents who force their children to participate in pageants even though their kids are clearly uncomfortable on stage and unhappy with the entire process.Full disclosure: My fascination with this show, and this column about it, is probably (like most things I do) just about me.When I was 17, I was in a local pageant — or “scholarship program” as it would probably prefer to be called — for high school juniors. It wasn’t something I would have done on my own, but my mom won the pageant when she was my age, and it was important to her that I compete in it. My mother wasn’t like the “pageant moms” on shows like “Toddlers & Tiaras.” She never forced me to do anything I was unwilling to do, and she knew the financial sacrifice for participating in a pageant was greater than any winnings would be.She genuinely believed this particular pageant was different than the rest, focused on a girl’s “inner beauty” as much as her outer beauty, and that this pageant could have a really positive impact on any participant’s self-esteem. I was doubtful about all that “be your best self” business going into the pageant. And now I’m sure that if pageants are good for anything, it’s encouraging you not to be yourself, but to conform to society’s antiquated idea of the perfect woman.All pageants are demeaning — and a little bit perverse.But I figured wearing pretty dresses and doing a little song and dance was the least I could do for the woman who was always willing to do anything for me. And I’d do it again, knowing how happy and proud it made her.The children on reality shows about pageants seem to be participating in pageants for similar reasons, though on a scarier scale. The parents are exponentially more excited and serious about competing than the children, who often say things like “I do pageants because it makes Mommy happy.” But your life shouldn’t revolve around what makes your parents happy when you’re that young. Many parents even bribe their children with toys and candy to make them more agreeable during the pageants.It’s one thing to make your kids eat their vegetables or wear clothes when they’d rather not. Sexualizing little girls — and paying them with Barbies or Twizzlers to coerce them into going along with it — is an entirely different matter.Perhaps the saddest part is that it makes for some damn entertaining television. The parents get a kick out of having their children judged, and I get a kick out of judging those parents.Maybe that’s the true appeal of reality TV. It lets us indulge in the worst of ourselves or things we’re ashamed to love (like playing dress-up, or “guidos”) without opening ourselves up to the same criticism we’re so quick to dole out.That seems much healthier than getting a wig and a spray tan, and singing “Colors of the Wind” in a skimpy outfit for a bunch of dirty old men.Sara Boyd is a 23-year-old general studies senior from Baton Rouge. Follow her on Twitter @TDR_sboyd.—-Contact Sara Boyd at [email protected]