In 2020, face masks and coverings are all the rage. They keep you healthy, make you seem mysterious and are the perfect accessory to complete any look! These days, you can tell a lot about a person just based on what kind of mask they’re wearing.
1. The Classic
The most classic iteration is the one-time use surgical mask. If you wear one of these, you’re probably a simple person with simple tastes and a complete disregard for our environment, climate change and the end of the world as we know it.
2. The Cotton
A reusable, cotton mask signals a crafty homebody with an ability to care for others. While this type of mask is the most common, the designs and patterns one chooses to adorn can help distinguish them from the rest of the population. The possibilities are endless.
3. The No-Nose
You’re bad at reading directions, but at least you tried.
4. The Class Clown
Wearing a mask with a mouth on the front of it is the equivalent to being confident in an outfit at home and then immediately regretting your decision once you go in public. While you ordered that funny mask thinking it’d be a hoot, you’re now getting a lot more concerned stares than laughs at the grocery store.
5. The Suburban Spaceman
Transparent face shields that wrap around the head are great for people who need to show others their beautiful smile in the middle of a Walmart. This futuristic option provides a chic and avant-garde look to any outfit. Paired best with a hazmat suit and a cute pair of platform boots, these shields say, “I’ve done my research. It’s all on Facebook.”
6. The COVID-19 Cowboy
Neck gaiters are the easiest indicator of a man with a fragile masculinity or one too many beers in his belly. These individuals usually spring for designs featuring skulls, the Confederate flag or some unholy combination of both.
7. The Halloween Mask
Okay, these are pretty funny.
8. The Karen
If you’re over 50 and you’re wearing a mask with your eyes rolled, this is indicative of a general distaste for teenage service workers who are doing their jobs and/or pent up anger towards your younger relatives who force you to wear one when you go out together in public.
9. The Plague Doctor
You’re a little bit retro! You’re most likely to be found interpreting animal bones, speaking in tongues or digging through your collection of leather-bound tomes in search of forbidden knowledge. Your Spotify feed is full of Gregorian chants. Also, nobody’s ever seen you without your mask on. They’re starting to get a little concerned. Do you even have a face underneath there?
10. The “I Have COVID-19”
Wearing no mask means you have an utter lack of empathy and a complete disregard for anybody’s life besides your own. Put on a mask. Don’t be a jerk.
Gabrielle Martinez is a 19-year-old mass communication sophomore from Gonzales, LA.
