My spring break featured an unconventional vacation.
A few friends and I headed out to blow off some steam at the start of the Easter holiday to a cozy little “clothing optional” beach called Hippie Hollow in Austin, Texas — a place where everyone is naked and being clothed makes you an outcast.
It’s not that I didn’t expect many of you to get naked in public on spring break. I guess the difference between me and you is that I did it legally, and running down the Panama City beach in the buff means you didn’t.
I know nudism isn’t necessarily the No. 1 priority on every (sober) person’s list, but for me, well, it has become somewhat of a hobby. Not really a hobby, but I get a kick out of the initial mortification/embarrassment/giddiness that goes along with taking off my clothes in front of a crowd, observing the multitudes of nudie-lovers from the beautiful bodies of the other young women and men to the dangling members of creepy old men wearing nothing but socks and tennis shoes.
You’re probably thinking, “Holy hell! This girl is a creep!” Yes, I sought out this little adventure, and yes, I enjoyed the hell out of it. But before you judge, I’d like to point out that after getting past the initial anxiety, it’s one of the most freeing experiences in the world.
I thought I was mentally prepared because I’d been to topless beaches in Croatia before, but Hippie Hollow was definitely completely different than anything I’ve ever experienced.
As soon as we saw signs signaling the beach was near, my heart started pounding, and I realized I had no clue what I had gotten myself into.
All I could think about was the fact that I can barely show cleavage in public let alone willingly choose to run around in broad daylight in my birthday suit. But there was no way I was going to back out, especially since I was the one who came up with the brilliant idea in the first place.
The first 15 minutes were the worst — arriving at the area with my clothes still on, spotting the first few au naturale people (who just so happened to be creepy and super old) walking along the park paths completely comfortable with their parts flailing freely in the sun.
I tried with all my might not to seem like a blushing, giggling school girl and not have a heart attack before my first article of clothing came off. I finally realized that I couldn’t flatten out my towel or move my stuff around anymore to avoid the culmination of my fears.
It was time to strip down, and despite the sagging, wrinkly bodies surrounding us, I still would’ve given anything to have translucent Spanx on hand.
But once the clothes were off, it was like a whole new naked world had opened to me, and I was more than proud to be a member. There was naked hiking, naked swimming, naked friend-making, naked conversing — and I was loving every single bit of it.
A big group of enthusiastic University of Texas as Austin students parked next to us, and that’s when the fun really began. These kids were taking naked to a whole new level.
They were painting their bodies and most intimate parts with crazy things from dragons to faces and taking on completely new outfits — like the work woman with her tie and the sheriff (my favorite) whose body paint ensemble came complete with chaps, a utility belt with guns and a star on her bare chest, topped off with a cowboy hat.
The men took to tying flashing lights and painting their parts solid, precious material colors like silver and gold, and decorating the surrounding areas with ribbons and colored ponytail holders.
The combination of the UT kids’ energy with our newfound naked fun in the sun gave us all a high I can’t even begin to explain.
So, I guess the moral of my little story is not that “life’s a nude beach, so get naked” because I might lose my job for saying that (I’m not going to deny that if I happened to stumble upon a naked campus day, I’d totally be down).
I guess what I’m trying to say is get naked, people (legally, of course) or at least take a chance on something that makes you completely uncomfortable — because the sense of freedom that comes along with doing something new and outrageous is pretty darn awesome.