Halloween is a scary time, but the next morning can be just as frightening.
So you’re going to a gnarly party tonight to celebrate All Hallows’ Eve in hopes of bobbing for boobies or trick-or-cheating on your boyfriend, and Hell knows there will be plenty of wasted hoochies dressed in cheap clichéd “sexy” costumes awaiting their equally unoriginal counterparts. I challenge you, dull one, to think twice before bringing home that hot mess.
Sure, it’s exciting seeing someone in an outfit you don’t normally see anyone clothed in. This is the one night of the year for some people to have an excuse to attempt role-playing with their partner. I suppose this is also the one night complete strangers can do the same.
I’m sure plenty of couples play dress-up out of season, but for some, Halloween is the perfect opportunity to try something new and fun. It’s incredibly convenient, plus you’ll probably be too intoxicated to feel weird anyway.
That fantasy you’ve been having could easily come to life on this magical night. Just be sure you don’t mistake a masked mate for someone else.
On the other hand, picking out the sexy sailor at that party after a few beverages may prove to be a bit more risky. Of course she’s dressed like that to get your attention, but proceed with caution. This goes for the ladies, too.
Different from a normal drunken hook-up, most people don’t look like themselves on Halloween. Some don’t even act like themselves. You may be cruising the sheets with Sailor Girl, but in an hour she’ll turn into a yack-o-lantern.
Even if the night does happen to go freakishly well, just think of what awaits tomorrow. You might have fallen asleep next to Captain Come-hither, but you’ll be waking up to Seaman Sue.
I’m sure this happens all the time after a night out, but the costumes and freaky energy in the atmosphere are especially deceiving.
Women should especially be wary of strange men. Although your attire for the evening may state otherwise, you have a brain, and you should use it. Sexual assault for young women is a very real issue, and it happens far too often, especially in college communities. Two-thirds of the time, the offender is someone the victim knows. Halloween is a particularly opportune night for someone to be taken advantage of.
Don’t let yourself become a victim. Be sure not to wander off alone, or at least let your friends know who you’re with.
While we’re on the subject of protection, might I mention keeping sexual safety in mind as well? It may be significant that the highest percentage of births is in the month of July, just nine months after Halloween. You may want to keep that in mind when you’re taking on Catwoman.
Just remember “American Horror Story,” and hope that leather-covered entity doesn’t try to kill you.
Gabie Bacques is a 21-year-old animal science senior from Mandeville. Follow her on Twitter @TDR_gbacques.
 
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Contact Gabie Bacques at [email protected]