The first Mardi Gras parade of the year happened in New Orleans five days after the horrific attack on New Year’s Day.

While there have been many tragic accidents that have occurred during Mardi Gras related to floats, pedestrians and the level of intoxication of the majority of people, to me, this attack makes me feel different.

Even a month after the attack on Bourbon Street, the idea of being in a big crowd in New Orleans doesn’t sound like fun to me.

An article by MSNBC said, “The New Year’s Day terrorist attack on Bourbon Street was as deadly as it was because it exploited one of the city’s best traits: its culture of people happily gathering in large numbers outside.”

As a Louisiana native, Mardi Gras is something I’ve attended my entire life, and while I’ve never been an avid fan of enormous crowds of drunk people pushing, the Mardi Gras spirit in New Orleans could always get me into the parades. Now, I think I would be on edge the whole time.

It isn’t a matter of how likely it is for another attack to occur so much as it’s the feeling of needing to distance myself from the drinking and hectic time that is Mardi Gras.

All these feelings made me wonder if I was alone in this, but a post on the r/NewOrleans subreddit on Reddit shows me that I’m not. One poster says that although they’ve always loved Mardi Gras, after the New Year’s attack and the political state of the country, they don’t want to participate this year.

The attacks and the country’s current political state will be heavy on the hearts of many from Louisiana, but for me, that affects my ability to celebrate Mardi Gras.

I have no judgments if anyone, especially from New Orleans, decides to attend Mardi Gras because of what it represents; it’s a time to get together with the people you care about and let the good times roll, but think before you go.

Kate Beske is a 21-year-old journalism senior from Destrehan, La.