If you have to force something or fake it, the answer is no.
When it comes to saying this two-letter word, a lot of people are met with anxiety, peer pressure and stress. For me, saying no rolls off the tip of my tongue. I have never felt obligated to say yes just because.
An example of something I say no to is invites; sometimes, I don’t want to be out and about. Why would I say yes when I would much rather order takeout and watch movies in my sweatpants with a face mask on?
Sometimes, saying no is choosing your comfort and, in some cases, your safety over the satisfaction of others. I can think of a number of times I respectfully declined an invitation and was so happy I did.
Even when the collective vote is yes, I never feel nervous to say no; it’s okay to be the “flamingo in a flock of pigeons.”
Saying no might come off as rude to some people, but it’s all about protecting your peace and setting boundaries with your friends and family. If someone in your life takes your “no” as an offense or insult, they hate you, kidding, not kidding.
But it’s 2025; saying yes is so 2024 unless the following occurs:
- Someone invites you to Justin Bieber’s long-awaited Eras Tour. Bieber has yet to make this announcement, but a long-time Belieber like myself can dream.
- It involves good, well-seasoned cuisine.
- Someone you think is hot will be in attendance. Personally, if you’re a handsome and single Jalen Hurts type, I’m there.
- It’s free.99.
- The dress code is sweatpants or pajamas.
- Socializing will be at a minimum (don’t you just love those friends you can sit on the couch with and scroll through Instagram in silence together). I know I do.
The list goes on and on, but the point is that my time is too valuable to spend with just anyone, anywhere.
I mean, could you imagine the last night of your life on Earth was spent at Tigerland? To each their own, I guess.
While you don’t have to be rude and go out of your way to hurt feelings, you must take your own feelings into consideration. Society loves to tell us, especially women, how horrible we are if we put our feelings first or consider them at all. We’re well aware that we can be considerate, caring and respectful while people also respect our own boundaries.
When you abandon your gut feelings and discernment, you run the risk of constant regret and bitterness. Possible side effects of abandoning your personal “no” are the following: heartburn, sleepless nights, depression, anxiety, regrettable hookups, STDs, stupid conversations, questionable reps, drunken karaoke mishaps, broken bones due to drunken escapades, overall embarrassment and self-degradation.
My longstanding history of saying “no” has saved me from all of that and more. Standing alone, being the only one to say no. can feel isolating and scary at times. But, at the end of the day, don’t let your people-pleaser traits control your life.
It’s time for you to unlock your superpower hidden within and say “no.”
Ava Francis is a 21-year-old journalism major from New Orleans residing in Texas.
