Editor’s note: The following column is satire.
Oliver Anthony’s hit song “Rich Men North of Richmond” has earned a spot atop the Billboard Top 100 and a wave of praise for being a working class anthem.
That title has been challenged by claims that the lyrics echo anti-working class rhetoric. The lyrics most in question read, “Lord, we got folks in the street, ain’t got nothin’ to eat, and the obese milkin’ welfare. Well, God, if you’re 5-foot-3 and you’re 300 pounds, taxes ought not to pay for your bags of fudge rounds.”
The idea that these lyrics are anti-poor is ridiculous. Nothing says, “I want a class-conscious movement against the powerful,” like repeating Reagan-era welfare queen propaganda.
Opponents of the song’s message also fail to realize that cutting social programs is necessary. The federal government spends far too much on fudge rounds. Congress recently passed a bill approving an increase to the fudge round fund. The budget of the program will go from $1.3 trillion to $1.9 trillion.
President Joe Biden supported this increase, saying, “This was absolutely necessary. People have a right to their fudge rounds.” When asked what cuts will be made to compensate, Biden responded, “We’re going to increase taxes on white people because of wokeness, and because George Soros told me to do it.”
In light of these events, questioning Anthony’s populist bonafides is foolish. He simply wants the federal government to stop spending money on welfare and send it to places that really matter to poor people, like the defense budget.
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The United States spent more than the next 10 countries combined on its military in 2022. If that number dropped to nine, the impact on poor Americans would be far worse than not having access to the insulin that they can’t afford. Imagine the disappointment of the people in Appalachia when they hear that their tax money is feeding people instead of funding Raytheon to develop a child-seeking missile.
The aforementioned similarities between the lyrics and Reagan-era welfare queen propaganda have caused some to erroneously speculate that the lyrics are a racist dog whistle. Nobody listening to this song harbors any bigotry in their heart, and they would never align with or vote for politicians that negatively impact marginalized communities.
Just look at the crowd at Anthony’s first performance; I’m surprised they still had the energy to show up after the BLM protest they all attended earlier. What could possibly be racist about a crowd that looks like that singing a song about people milking welfare?
The criticisms of Anthony are coming from elites who don’t want to see the working class band together. That’s why the right-wing media apparatus has pushed this song so hard — they’re always on the side of the little guy.
Wealthy people have nightmares about Anthony’s vision of the world coming to fruition. A world where they get their taxes cut because welfare no longer exists. They spend sleepless nights thinking what they would do with all of that cursed extra money.
Class-conscious Americans should recognize this song as their new anthem. The wealthy are probably considering banning the song as a last-ditch effort before the peasants storm the gates demanding to give back their benefits. The “Rich Men” can try, but they won’t stop Anthony’s brand of populism.
Frank Kidd is a 22-year-old mass communication senior from Springfield, Virginia.
