Interested in politics? Me neither.But if you enjoy kicking back for a couple of laughs with your buddies, then perhaps you have been watching the presidential debates. And if you saw the one this past Tuesday, you may have noticed something amazing: a real-time representation of reactions from undecided Ohio voters.This is the future?We were promised flying cars, Mars vacations and cyborg sex bots. Instead, we got Perception Analyzers.These little boxes, rather like remote controls, have a single enormous dial on them that users turn to indicate whether they agree or disagree with what they are viewing. Then, through the techno-wizardry of electricity, their preferences are beamed to TV screens across the globe.But why does CNN even broadcast this crap?Let us examine.Will decided voters be affected by these perception analyses? Of course not; they have already decided. Are undecided voters going to care? Let’s hope not. If they have gone this far without making a choice, I pray they won’t base their decision on other people’s opinions.Of course, these devices create tons of pundit fodder. But surely that’s not the reason.But don’t get cynical! These things represent a positive development.Researchers say the Perception Analyzer has untapped potential across a variety of fields. Just imagine all those times you wanted to rate a loved one on a 1 to 100 scale.Professors: Have you ever wondered whether your new PowerPoint is a winner or a snoozer? Give out a few Perception Analyzers and let the students do the talking! (Note: Sleeping students may be unable to properly participate.)Chats with the Chancellor going kaput? Throw your freezie pop on the ground in disgust and spin that dial to 0.And ladies! Now you have a tool for rating your man’s performance in the bedroom — how well is he fluffing your pillows, straightening your sheet and tucking in your blanket?I could write all day about the uses of the Perception Analyzer — but my editor’s dial indicates the “pillow fluffing” comment scored higher than anything else in this column. So now I’m going to pull out quickly and finish while I’m on top.Just like I usually do.—-Contact Daniel McBride at [email protected]