Forget crime. Forget politics. If the LSU community cares about one thing, it’s tailgating. Nothing motivates 100,000 Baton Rouge residents like the prospect of an SEC opponent, a charred beef patty and a cooler brimming with booze.
Joe Cahn can relate. Cahn, the self-appointed “Commissioner of Tailgating,” has taken it upon himself to travel this great land in search of the finest gameday party in America. His quest began seven years ago and this week his Winnebago stops at Tiger Stadium for Saturday’s Ole Miss match. Then and there, Cahn will decide if LSU’s fall Saturday ritual is anything to write home about.
Wielding as much tailgating power as he does, Cahn’s important-sounding title begs the question: Who says he is the tailgating expert? The Coca Cola Corporations who finances Cahn’s voyage around the country says so. Coke pays Cahn to observe the tailgating customs around America, critiquing and commenting on the various incarnations of this modern-day hootenanny for football and Nascar afficionados everywhere.
“It’s the last great American neighborhood, ‘the tailgating neighborhood,'” Cahn said. “Where no one locks their doors, everyone is happy to see you and all are together sharing fun, food and football!”
Who knew Nerf footballs and warm Bud Light had such important sociological implications? Last great neighborhood schtick aside, Cahn isn’t exactly an objective researcher. No lab coat and clipboard, this guy is in the thick of things with his home-team colors and a 21-foot flag, firing up some of his famous jambalaya for anyone who’s hungry.
In all the years he’s been traveling and tailgating, Cahn has seen and eaten just about everything and he has the staggering statistics to prove it. He’s logged more than 217,000 total miles, burned 34,286 gallons of gasoline, visited all 32 NFL home stadiums, 60 college stadiums and seven Nascar tracks.
“I think I’ve heard of this guy,” said Matt Gatlin, an architecture junior, who participates in heavy tailgating at every home game. “I guess this is a pretty good game for him to come. It’s gonna be as big as we’ve done so far this year because it’s the last home game and it’s [against] Mississippi.”
While Gatlin said he was unsure of where Cahn would set up his headquarters on Saturday, he felt the Commissioner would come away with a memorable tailgating experience, regardless.
“Down here [LSU] we do it a lot different than other places,” Gatlin said. “Up north, sometimes they’ll drink a little before the game then they’ll come back out at halftime and drink some more. Here, like I won’t do too much on Friday if I’m gonna be out there [tailgating] the next day. I’m up at like 8 a.m. and ready to go. It’s definitely all day.”
Thanks to Joe Cahn, Saturday’s pre-game will be as important for Tiger fans as the real game will be for the players.