This summer has been a relatively uneventful one on the movie scene, because everything went according to plan. “Terminator 3” kicked butt, “League of Extraordinary Gentlemen” was overkill and “How to Deal” was your classic teen-angst love flick.
But just because the last summer issue of The Reveille is rolling out today doesn’t mean you shouldn’t get the lowdown on all of the summer movies yet to come.
After all, we’ve still got like, 10 sequels left!
Until the next Revelry section comes out Aug. 25, here’s a primer to all the wide-release movies hitting the big screen this month.
Even though the original was slammed by the critics (it still raked in the cash at the box office) “Tomb Raider 2” comes out this Friday. The film showcases the blood-amulet wearing, Billy Bob-hating Angelina Jolie and her skin-tight sports bra and biking shorts. The plot is simple – Lara Croft heads around the world in search of Pandora’s Box, she kills many mystical beasts and probably leaves a wake of destruction behind her.
Save your money unless you absolutely have to see Jolie.
Also entering the box-office this Friday is Spider-Man Tobey Maguire’s “Seabiscuit.” Maguire stars in the heartwarming true story as troubled jockey Red Pollard, who finds luck with Seabiscuit, a wayward horse who captured the nation’s hearts during the 1930s.
It’s rumored Maguire was injured in the filming of “Seabiscuit,” and had to hold off on “Spider-Man 2,” which is set for release next summer. “Seabiscuit,” is a sure bet and probobly will be Oscar-nominated before it’s all said and done.
The third “American Pie” movie is released Aug. 1 minus original stars Chris Klein, Mena Suvari, Tara Reid, Natasha Lyonne and Shannon Elizabeth. Early reviews of “American Wedding,” are coming in, and although the movie focuses around the wedding of Jim (Jason Biggs) and Michelle (Alyson Hannigan), sharing the starring role is everyone’s favorite bad boy, Stifler (Sean William Scott).
After a multi-year run as lesbian Willow on UPN’s “Buffy the Vampire Slayer,” Hannigan is playing for the other team once again. The auburn-haired band dork now is marrying the guy who just can’t hold back when he sees an apple pie.
After the flop that was “American Pie 2,” you can expect the usual dirty jokes and innuendoes. From a pubic hair incident to topless strippers, “American Wedding,” should be an interesting flick.
High on my list of must-not sees is the Ben Affleck/Jennifer Lopez love flick “Gigli.” Affleck stars as hit-man Larry Gigli, who accepts the role of bodyguard to the mentally challenged brother of a district attorney. Lopez is sent to supervise and the two fall in love.
Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman (“Eyes Wide Shut”) and Billy Bob Thorton and Angelina Jolie (“Pushing Tin”) have proved couples never should do a movie together. Neither should Affleck and Lopez.
Early reviews of horror flick “Freddy vs. Jason” are calling it “Nightmare on Elm Street with Jason thrown in” with “awful dialogue.” Freddy resurrects Jason and sends him to Elm Street. But as Jason rampages around Freddy decides to stop him, setting up a few fight scenes which appear to be visually impressive from the previews.
Also entering theaters this summer are kid flicks “Freaky Friday” and “Spy Kids 3-D,” teen horror flick “Jeepers Creepers 2” and Catholic priest mystery “The Order.”
So before classes start up again, enjoy your time in the theater. Take in the air conditioning and while you are loathing the 20 minutes of previews and commercials remember it’s all part of the summer movie experience.
See you in the fall.