Cane’s: the home of beloved chicken and special sauce. Whether I’m walking or driving home, they always seem to have a line there.

The fandom behind the chicken hotspot is extraordinary, and I wanted to find out why.

My journey was to taste Cane’s in my purest form, sober and not hungry. Could my hesitant tastebuds cave into the crisp bite of the magical chicken tenders, the crinkle-cut fries, the renowned bread and the delicate, finely shredded coleslaw? Let’s find out.

The Fries 2/10

Well, at least they weren’t raw. Nothing is worse than squishy, unseasoned, unsalted crinkle-cut french fries. Who knew I’d ever have sympathy for a potato? There’s an art to french fries that’s clearly not grasped by the Cane’s research and development team. I urge Cane’s to get back to the drawing board and try again.

The Bread 10/10

I’m assuming the creator of the bread was on vacation when Cane’s rolled out their fries because the bread was fantastic. The crisp, buttery shell was accompanied by a fluffy, pillowy core that made my taste buds dance. There is nothing that needs to change with the bread, but remember to toast both sides.

The Slaw 1/10

You see, the fries I knew were cooked and wouldn’t kill me, but the coleslaw, I was unsure. There’s nothing funny about it; the slaw was just bad. It was like eating a bottle of mayo with shredded bits of cabbage as pulp. I lunged for my sweet tea and never took another bite.

The Chicken 7/10 (with the sauce)

The true test of good chicken is how it tastes without any sauce. I wanted the chicken to be the finale because, as the main entree, Cane’s owed it to my 12 dollars that the chicken saved the day. As crispy as it was, you can tell Cane’s expects the flavor to depend on the sauce. I couldn’t say it was terrible, but I wouldn’t opt for good either; it was the true definition of average.

In conclusion, I want my money back. The bread, while fantastic, wasn’t worth the experience, and the cole slaw is worthy of a lawsuit. Restaurants, in general, need to abandon crinkle-cut fries as they give Walmart freezer aisle vibes. The chicken was high school cafeteria esque, but it wasn’t bad if you added the sauce. Cane’s has proved to be another overhyped restaurant chain with a delusional fanbase blinded by fandom and proximity.

Mohammad Tantawi is a 24-year-old mass communication senior from Smyrna, Tenn.