It seems the colonials in the northeast and southwestern parts of the state are in a bit of a spat.
There is a growing controversy concerning how the University of Louisiana at Lafayette — more commonly known as ULL — chooses to refer to itself. They have taken quite a liking to the name “The University of Louisiana”, sans Lafayette, a fitting name for a flagship school of the state.
There is just one minor issue; ULL is not a flagship school.
In fact, Louisiana already has a flagship university, whose name inspires awe and dreams of higher ACT scores.
That school is our own Louisiana State University.
To clarify, ULL has higher ACT standards, but the top students at LSU on average score three points higher than those brainiac chili peppers.
The whole spat started when local writers and other media began referring to ULL’s athletic teams as “Louisiana,” much as one would refer to the University of Florida’s teams as simply “Florida.”
Now, for those that don’t know, once upon a time, ULL and ULM were University of Southwestern Louisiana and Northeast Louisiana University, respectively. The state legislature changed this — get that, by state law — in 1999.
Along with the name change came the caveat that any official mention of either school required the city to be associated with its respective school. Legislators agreed on this rule to avoid this exact situation the schools are in now.
While the sports writers’ artistic license tweaked a few noses at ULM, it was for the most part shrugged off.
The real trouble began when the university began picking up on this trend.
ULL’s school website domain name, formerly ull.edu, is now louisiana.edu, an obvious jab at ULM. What’s more, the website details specific rules about the school name.
Among them is a prohibition against referring to the school as UL “in any instance.”
I’m not joking, that’s an actual thing. I sincerely hope that every time I refer to the school as such, an unfortunate future baby Cajun earns their “Ragin’” modifier.
ULL. ULL. ULL. Sorry, kids.
On top of that, the design for ULL’s class rings boldly state “University of Louisiana 1898”; once again, no Lafayette.
Alright ULL, here’s the deal: you are NOT the University of Louisiana. You are NOT a flagship school. You’re barely a half step above that redneck filled community college that you’re having a hormone-fueled quarrel with.
On top of that, your athletics are wanting.
Now, “wanting” used in that sense is a turn of phrase intelligent people sometimes use when they don’t want to say “lacking.”
But seriously, you guys lost to Kansas State.
And please do not try to flaunt your little “Cajun Dome.” Any building that hosts middle school Beta conventions isn’t worthy of being called an athletic facility.
And while we’re on the subject, let’s talk about that mascot of yours. I understand that the region of the state ULL is in is called Acadiana, which is in homage to the Canadians that were pushed out of Nova Scotia by the British, but therein lies the problem: You chose Canadians who lost a war as your team’s mascot.
At least ULM has the remotely badass Warhawk.
In short, stop overestimating yourselves. You are bound by law to be known as a regional school, and you will continue to do so. Now sit down and be quiet, because daddy is home and he’s tired of your crap.
Ryan McGehee is a 20-year-old political science, history, and international studies junior from Zachary. Follow him on Twitter @JRyanMcGehee.