It’s a bird! It’s a plane! It’s a … what is it?
It’s a drone, and if our captains of the Internet retail industry have their way, it could be flying over your backyard almost every day.
This crazy notion began in December when Amazon CEO, Jeff Bezos, told “60 Minutes” the online hegemon would use “octocopters” to deliver parcels to customers’ doorsteps.
Aside from the obvious scenario that this was a marketing ploy during the Christmas holiday, drones could be the next revolution in package conveyance.
This is just the most recent spate of bad news for the United States Postal Service, which has been losing its grip on the industry for the last hundred or so years.
But the danger is, as the atmospheric delivery apparatus proliferates around the country, we could lose what semblance of privacy we have left — that is, if we have any at all.
The last time I checked, neither the government nor any private entity had the means to look inside our homes. Drones could be used for just that, and a recent bill in the Louisiana Senate seeks to curtail these incidents before they happen.
After failing to pass last Monday, Sen. Dan Claitor, R-Baton Rouge, re-introduced the Deterrence of Reconnaissance Over Noncriminal Entities, or DRONE Act, on Tuesday. The bill would prohibit government or privately owned unmanned aircraft from conducting surveillance on private property.
The bill passed after Claitor invited the room to Google search an infringing drone sold at Brookstone, which he said could be used by snoopers to take images of people inside their homes, according to NOLA.com | The Times-Picayune.
Apparently there was no law on the books preventing this. Not that there is now, because the bill has yet to pass the House, much less garner the signature of Gov. Bobby Jindal.
But the issue is not resolved in the mere prevention of a few peeping Toms. Although this law certainly should exist, our legislators may want to think toward the future and a world in which our retail industry rules the skies.
Thousands of drones could potentially be buzzing around just above street level to relieve us of the tantalizing wait between an online order and its dastardly slow delivery within five to seven business days.
Why business days? Most of us are lazy seven days of the week, so just give us our stuff so we can use it.
We should be aware of the danger that comes with letting companies that rely on our consumption come more into our lives.
And imagine the noise — walking around campus would be like attending a soccer match during the 2010 World Cup in South Africa.
If Bezos wasn’t just trying to put Amazon on the minds of consumers last Christmas, and drones are destined to take the skies, then we have to lay the necessary ground rules on what they can and cannot do.
This seems like a foregone conclusion, but just look at how long it took the government to ban texting and driving.
Instant package delivery seems great in theory, but if we are going to have to surrender what’s left of our private lives to make it happen, then maybe drones should go the way of texting behind the wheel — it can wait, people.
Eli Haddow is a 21-year-old history and English junior from New Orleans.