When chemical engineering sophomore Emma Madere first came to LSU, she didn’t see herself joining a sorority. However, hoping to continue the feeling of sisterhood she had from an all-girls Catholic school, she decided to get involved in Greek Life.

During the stressful process of rush her freshman year, Madere was disappointed, especially when her top-pick sororities didn’t show interest in her. It wasn’t until a few conversations with members of Zeta Tau Alpha that her attitude had changed. 

Once she was accepted into Zeta Tau Alpha, Madere said she found that as she got more involved, she felt more confident in her decision to join Greek Life. 

“I had doubts in my sorority. I genuinely feel a lot of people had,” Madere said. “But I genuinely realized that I do want to be in my sorority, and I love it.”

For Madere and other members of LSU’s 14 sororities, Greek Life and the rush process that leads up to it can be a stressful part of finding where one belongs at a university of over 34,000 students. 

“Our brain is a social brain,” said Colleen Sinclair, an associate professor of social psychology. “One of our primary, basic needs is the need for belonging. So if you’re a freshman and you’re presented with a campus of thousands upon thousands of students and you want to find a place to fit in, Rush can help you narrow your options.”

Sororities offer a clear opportunity for young women to fulfill the need for a community and support group. They’re designed to provide long-term human connections, which can complete one’s need to belong while narrowing down what can seem like overwhelming options, Sinclair said.

The selection process of rush can also lead to a self enhancement because recruits were specifically selected to be in that group, boosting their self-esteem.

“So once you’re a part of that group, then you incorporate it into yourself,” Sinclair said.

Sinclair labeled this as a process of social identity formation that can lead pledges to prioritize group identity over their own, altering certain behaviors to reflect the group’s norms. The relationship between a sorority and its members is significant, creating a community among shared experience. 

Similar to how romantic relationships work, Sinclair added, if someone were to break up with the group, they’d be losing part of themselves because they’ve become so connected.

“And we’re very protective of losing part of ourselves,” Sinclair said.

Like many college relationships that end prematurely, some sorority members become dissatisfied with their experience and leave their sisterhood. Pre-nursing sophomore Sydney Yeager decided to quit Zeta Tau Alpha after growing increasingly dissatisfied with life in a sorority.

It was Yeager’s fear of missing out that ultimately drove her to rush in the spring of her freshman year. 

“I think people seeing groups of girls in fun clothes and glitter in their hair can be inspiring because they see that and want to be a part of that,” Yeager said. “Some of the events are taking pictures and capturing moments of happiness through images to post on social media even though, at that time, the smiles in the pictures were fake or forced.”

After the general warmness that came with being a new member of Zeta Tau Alpha, she said that many of her newfound friends reverted to cliques and left her eating lunches alone at times.

While Yeager was alone, negative thoughts compounded and she began to avoid participation before leaving the organization entirely after hearing she’d have to participate in the rush process all over again in the fall.

Yeager cautions incoming students who want to rush to “be open to some disappointment.” 

“I feel like Greek Life in general just worsened my social anxiety because it just built on that idea that everyone’s looking at you a certain way, they don’t like you and everyone is judging you,” Yeager said.

A current sorority member that rushed in fall 2021, who wishes to remain anonymous, described rush as a psychological gauntlet.

“I was vomiting every day, not sleeping,” she said. “I ended up losing like 10 pounds. It was a lot.”

When the sorority member, now a sophomore, joined as a freshman, she was afraid of being lonely. 

But as the rush process progressed, she was especially nervous about the judgment she’d be facing, explaining that the entire process was impersonal.

“Certain houses cut me before they even had a conversation with me,” she said. “I never even got to walk through the door.”

She described how conversations felt staged and unnatural, feeling she had to commit to a personality that wasn’t her own.

Despite this, she was accepted into a sorority, finding many of the problems about a staged reality subside, allowing her to foster genuine friendships, which compelled her to continue in the sorority.

But still, issues persisted. Early mornings, long nights and the threat of monetary charges for every day she wasn’t in attendance became a regular part of her life.

She described how she was increasingly unable to meet basic needs like sleeping and eating. 

Her phone usage was limited and wasn’t able to talk to her mother as much as she needed to. Outside of a few allocated 30-minute breaks, she said she was completely restricted from her phone by sisters managing the process.

By the time rush recruitment party days rolled around, she said she might be awake from 6 a.m. to 1:30 a.m. the next morning. The source added that she’d heard many women undertake internships just to avoid rush.

“I’d go to the bathroom during breaks or lunch and there was always someone in the bathroom sobbing or having a breakdown of some sort,” she said. “I can most definitely say there were multiple girls in the organization not handling the rush process well and not able to cope.”

She felt trapped, she said, unable to leave because her sorority was losing members who could recruit recruiters and she didn’t want to disappoint anyone by leaving her recruiting position.

“I was literally having suicidal thoughts. I wasn’t showering,” she said. “It was probably one of the worst states I’ve ever been in long-term.”

When other managing members of the sorority caught wind of the low morale and confronted them about it, she said that they were told they couldn’t look “sad and depressed.”

She felt as if her sorority sisters were trying to push recruiters too hard and make an image out of them that just wasn’t there.

But she staked it out because of the friendships she made with some of the sweetest and most caring women she’s ever met. If she were to leave that organization, she’d be ostracizing herself from those women, she said.

“Those relationships are worth it to me,” she said. “If I left [the sorority], I feel like anyone in that organization would just look down on me.”

While Madere understands the feelings of those who chose not to continue in Greek Life like Yeager, she doesn’t blame women who drop their sorority, especially if the primary reason is because of money; she did, however, recommend getting involved and giving it a chance before coming to a pessimistic conclusion.

“From previous girls who Rushed, they’re like, ‘I can’t go through that again,’” Madere said.

Rush is a mixed experience, Madere said. She believes it can be stressful and selective. But, she added, that is by design. She does wish that it wasn’t so stress-inducing.

Sinclair compared rush to military boot camp: a stressful environment designed to weed out the people who can’t do it, while creating enhanced commitment among recruits to the group through shared experiences.

“The more effort you put in to gain something,” Sinclair said. “The more value you place upon it in order to justify that effort you put in.”