Scooby-Doo and the gang could have sat through Gil Kenan’s remake of the 1982 horror film, “Poltergeist,” without any “ruh-roh’s” or “jinkies” from the investigative team. “Poltergeist” (2015) was actually on par with the comedic levels of Scooby-Doo films, far from its intended fright appeal.
The parents, played by Sam Rockwell and Rosemarie DeWitt, unknowingly relocate their family to a home sitting on top of a graveyard. Unfortunately for the Bowen family, the bones in the graveyard remain in the ground, and the spirits of the dead make a ghastly attempt to reach the spirit world by abducting little Madison Bowen.
Madison, played by 8-year-old Kennedi Clements, immediately places “Poltergeist” on a path for failure. The adorable child with her stuffed animal in hand has the entire theatre cracking up with laughter as she repeats any curse word exclaimed by her teenage sister.
Laughter instead of gasps and screams filled the sold-out movie theatre I attended in Lake Charles, Louisiana, and it didn’t end with an 8-year-old swearing on the big screen. The laughter, at least for my two friends and me, continued into the supposed scary scenes.
Flying objects, an angry tree, strange clowns, a squirrel and a gaggle of ghosts failed to send shivers down my spine. This failure may be a function of the film’s weak screenwriting or its annoying acting cast.
The prepubescent son of the Bowen’s, played by Kyle Catlett, acts as the prophetic voice of the family, warning them of strange events occurring around the house. While Catlett’s character should have created a foundation of anxious fear among the audience, his irritating performance made me upset and disappointed when the poltergeist abducted his sister and not him.
Just like most horror films, “Poltergeist” brought in a team of experts to attempt to remedy the Bowen’s ghost issue and bring back their daughter. Normally, the experts arrive and strike fear into the audience by recounting stories of ghouls and spirits, casting doubt over whether all will end well for the main characters.
Instead, the “Paranormal Research department” is a bunch of goofballs who eventually call in a “more experienced” expert who is even more of a joke. When the Steve Irwin of ghost catchers arrives at the home, there was no going back — “Poltergeist” wasted its last breath.
Gil Kenan should consider filming a Scooby-Doo movie next time he takes a gander into the horror industry. I’m sure I would get more goosebumps from Shaggy and Scooby’s antics than I did from the joke of a movie that is “Poltergeist.”
Justin DiCharia is a 21-year-old mass communication senior from Slidell, Louisiana. You can reach him on Twitter @JDiCharia.