Vending machines in bars are in dire need of an upgrade.Instead of providing patrons with tax-high cancer sticks or pre-historic feminine hygiene products, bars should offer customers something more useful and affordable —condoms.Every so often a patron may stumble upon a rusted condom machine in the restroom of a run-down bar, but it’s most likely empty.If it’s not, the chances of its contents being safe to use are slim to none.In the Bible Belt, holy rollers aren’t supposed to promote promiscuity and drunken, meaningless sex, so the possibility of finding a condom machine around these parts is unlikely.But that doesn’t mean they shouldn’t exist.If used properly, condoms are 85 to 98 percent effective, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Condoms also greatly reduce the risk of HIV and AIDS transmission.STD rates in Louisiana are among the highest in the nation.Baton Rouge tops many of the national charts with high cases of STDs, including syphilis. Baton Rouge also ranked sixth in AIDS case rates among the largest metropolitan areas in the U.S., according to the Louisiana Department of Health and Hospitals.Yet somehow the University ranked 12th on Trojan’s 2008 sexual health report card.Nearly 70 percent of college students admit to having engaged in sexual activity primarily as a result of being under the influence of alcohol, or to having sex they wouldn’t have had if they had been sober, according to a recent California Polytechnic University study.Putting two and two together, 60 percent of STDs are transmitted and 2/3 of unplanned pregnancies occur.But apart from the health benefits of installing condom machines in bars, people must also consider the convenience factor.It’s much easier to insert a couple of coins in a condom machine at some bar than having to run by a convenience store later — because convenience stores really aren’t that convenient.They close hours before the bars do. And if for some reason one is miraculously open at 2 a.m., by the time you buy a pack of rubbers, your drunken significant other’s beer goggles have worn off or that person has passed out waiting.Talk about a mood killer.In many places, condom machines are as common as beer on tap.Bars in larger cities, from New York to New Orleans, house condom machines.In most European countries, it’s not unusual for pubs to stock condoms, vibrating penis rings and even Viagra.You don’t have to go to the toilet for these. The bartenders conveniently store them behind the counter so patrons can purchase a pack as they close out their tabs.And surprise, surprise — U.K. STD rates are substantially lower than the U.S., according to Avert, an international AIDS charity.While condom machines may be a healthy, convenient investment, bar owners may not be too keen on installing them on their premises as they are at least $300 a pop, pun intended.And Bible beaters would probably give them quite a bit of flak.However, if installing condom machines in a couple of bars is all it takes to prevent the clap, then that’s a solid investment.And paying $1 for a condom is much cheaper than paying for knocking up a partner from a one-night stand.Drew Belle Zerby is a 22-year-old mass communication senior from Vidalia.—-Contact Drew Belle Zerby at [email protected]