For those of you who missed it, last Tuesday was a big night.It was Election Night in America, the court of public opinion was in session and the jury of American voters went to the polls to pass judgment on the highest levels of government. The Democratic Congress, President Obama, indeed, the whole federal government was on the spot, and the entire world watched with with bated breath as Americans rendered their verdict on public policy.And most of you lazy college students probably missed it.I am, of course, kidding.Tuesday was in fact an election night, but to call it, as CNN did, Election Night in America may be a stretch. The only elections occuring that night were on the state or local level, most significantly gubernatorial elections in Virginia and New Jersey, a mayoral race in New York City and a congressional race in up-state New York.If you’re reading this riveting list of high-stakes political battles and wondering why you should care, well, congratulations, you’re smarter than most of the American TV media.Which is hardly a resounding accolade.
As obvious a hyperbole as those first few sentences seem, it’s barely an exaggeration of how cable news covered the elections. Pundits and anchors had been waiting for Tuesday for weeks, cranking up the hype and amping up the inanity. Almost universally, this grandstanding took the same form: these elections, while small and scattered, would serve as an unscientific forecast of the Democrats’ future political prospects and would measure how Americans feel about Congress and Obama.By the time the night itself came, news-show personalities had worked themselves into a frenzy. When polls opened in Virginia, a swarm of analysts were there to sagely breakdown the results.CNN takes the award for “most grandstanding.” The network boasted eight — count ‘em, eight — different pundits talking non-stop for several hours while the ballots came in.”Humiliating” is the best word to describe the coverage. To say CNN — and cable news outlets as a whole — was beating a dead horse is misleading — it’s more like they were beating a horse that didn’t exist.At no point in the election coverage I watched — I made an exception to my cable news boycott to watch it — did any of the assembled talking heads make the connection between the local races and the national stage. They indicated these elections were a referendum on Obama, but they didn’t say how.The reason is simple — they couldn’t.It may be true voter displeasure with Democratic leadership could conceivably push them to vote Republican — for state elections, it’s a stretch, but we’ll accept it — but there are far more varied reasons why a state would choose a governor.You know, like, how well voters think they might run the state?Besides, half the races were almost predetermined outcomes; Republican Bob McConnel was a shoe-in for Virginia’s governorship, and Independent New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg was running virtually unopposed.The real reason networks blew Tuesday night out of proportion is simple — to feed the gaping ratings maw that is 24-hour cable news, nothing but the most sensational, drawn-out coverage would suffice.It’s the same reason why the New Jersey race had been making news for weeks — the media leaped onto the issue of candidate Chris Christie’s weight, stirring a debate which never should have happened to grab the attention of a perpetually bored viewer base.The only election that deserved even the smallest attention was the New York’s 23rd Congressional District. That race highlighted the huge ideological divide that has kept the Republican Party in chaos, when rigid candidate Doug Hoffman bucked the Republican establishment and ran under his own “Conservative Party.” That race deserved some national attention, simply because it illustrated the weakness of the Republicans and because it attracted input from nationally  recognized conservatives such as Sarah Palin and Rush Limbaugh.If TV news wanted to — as the current 24-hour cycle demands — blow something out of proportion, it should have been this race.Nobody outside of Virginia cares who won its governor’s race — and CNN and its contemporaries should stop trying to make us think we do.Matthew Albright is a 21-year-old mass communication senior from Baton Rouge. Follow him on Twitter @TDR_malbright.—-Contact Matthew Albright at [email protected]