It usually happens during the third year of a college student’s life.
Often described as “one of the most rewarding experiences of one’s life,” studying abroad is the go-to ritual for twenty-something students to step out of their comfort zones in order to “find themselves.”
As I begin my final year at LSU, I face another kind of situation that, while not as commonly discussed in public forums, happens just as often — I’m not studying abroad but most of my friends are.
While I’m all about supporting fish-out-of-water experiences for personal growth, I sadly can’t afford to ship myself to Europe and take two classes for half a year.
In an effort to put aside the bitterness — and in order for me to avoid hypocrisy when liking their Instagram pictures — I found myself subconsciously creating this list to deal with 50 percent of my closest friends leaving me behind.
Saying Goodbye
While some people would choose to share in the joy of their friends’ upcoming international adventures, others might choose a passive-aggressive approach to prepare for the inevitable separation.
Dropping subtle hints on the struggles of living in a foreign country or picking fights with close friends might make saying goodbye easier but I wouldn’t recommend it. Raining on your friend’s parade will not make you feel better or less jealous, it’ll only ruin your friendship.
Spending as much time as you can with them before they leave, and, in my case, inviting yourself to spend two days locked in their house binge-watching a crappy TV show and bonding is the best way to properly send them off.
Find something to do
Your first day back on LSU’s campus will be bizarre. Walking in the Union, I crossed paths with someone that, from behind, looked exactly like one of my friends who is studying abroad.
As I prevented my instinctive reaction to yell her name, it finally hit me the person I was going to call won’t be here all year, and I might as well get over it.
Obviously, this is easier said than done, so the realistic thing to do is to get busy.
Fill your schedule with activities to keep your whining and sulking time to a minimum. Yes, you have a right to sulk and whine because you don’t get to go to Europe, but you might as well do something productive.
Get jobs or internships to put on your resumé. Make some nice pottery in a leisure class at the Union so you can smash it later to relieve stress or volunteer for a good cause around Baton Rouge.
Time makes any instance of change become normal and distraction makes time go by faster.
Lean on the friends that are still here and make new ones
If you’re a pessimist, your first instinct will be to focus on the fact that your friends left you.
Just remember while some of your friends are off doing their thing thousands of miles away, there are others who have also been left behind.
After you spend some time theorizing about what will happen to your friends while they study abroad, start planning ways you’re going to make this year at LSU the best one yet.
It’s fair game to show off all the fun you’re having in school and in America since your friends will most likely do the same from whatever country they’ve chosen.
Be happy for them and yourself
No matter where we are during our third year of college, we will inevitably “find ourselves.”
Don’t waste your time feeling bad for the things you aren’t able to do. We must take advantage of the opportunities we’re given, which is what our friends are doing in the first place.
Mark your calendar when your friends are coming back and pray that they don’t get “Taken.”
Jose Bastidas is a 21-year-old mass communication senior from Caracas, Venezuela. You can reach Jose on Twitter @jabastidas.