The building was circular, a chapel of sorts. Religious symbols adorned the walls, and you couldn’t help but notice all of the world’s major religions were represented.
A book with names of those who stopped to pray — for deliverance, for health, for a cure, for the miracle possible within these walls — was enough to bring tears to the eyes. There were many names of those hurting — so many children who had died in the spring of their life, like cherry blossoms falling from the branch.
This chapel, at the St. Jude’s Hospital in Memphis, is for the families of children bravely smiling through their pain. The youthful understanding of mortality and the hope for tomorrow is an eternal portrait — painted in shades of fear mixed with hope.
I never spent much time in thought about mortality and disease. It always seemed these afflictions were the lot of the old, the poor or those other nameless masses which were not a part of my world. I decided to raise money for St. Jude’s Children’s Hospital in 2002 by running a marathon with the St. Jude’s Heroes. I’ve also raised money twice since then for Leukemia and Lymphoma society with the Team in Training.
But I always felt a little detached despite all this time and effort spent raising money. I wanted to help, but there was not a deep connection to the cause other than the fact that my grandfather had leukemia when he passed away, and besides my desire to help the sick.
My sister, Renee, was recently diagnosed with a severe case of Lupus. She’s younger than I am and has always been beautiful, athletic and intelligent. She competed in equestrian competitions — and she was good. She could have probably made it to the Olympics, except for one thing: her diagnosis with Lupus.
All my charitable work suddenly took on a new meaning.
It broke my heart to hear her say on some days she wishes she could simply run, but can’t because she’s just too tired from treatment. I told her, “It’s OK, because I will run for you.” And I mean it — every step of the way.
For better or for worse, now it’s personal.
Lupus is a disease caused by an overactive autoimmune system. In the U.S., 1.5 million people are estimated to have this disease.
“Autoimmune means your immune system cannot tell the difference between these foreign invaders and your body’s healthy tissues and creates auto antibodies to attack and destroy healthy tissue,” explains the Lupus Foundation of America Web site. “These auto antibodies cause inflammation, pain and damage in various parts of the body,”
“I am always talking myself through this next breath . . . the last couple of days have just been getting harder and harder,” Renee wrote in her journal, which she gave to me. “And I want nothing more than for my doctor to come back so that I can speak with her. People are noticing my weakness, and I don’t want them to. I want to be like my old self.”
Amanda Judice — native of Lafayette and member of the Delta Delta Delta sorority at LSU passed away last month because of complications with a bone marrow transplant — she was 21 years old. She had Severe Aplastic Anemia.
Aplastic anemia is a disease in which the bone marrow does not produce enough new blood cells. Attending her funeral, I was overcome with an intense sorrow. She touched many lives with her beauty and courage.
We owe Amanda, Renee and many others a commitment to dedicate our slack resources of time, skills and money to the pursuit of cures for such diseases.
Tragedies such as these create a sense of urgency for me to spend my time on this earth helping those sick, in pain and short on hope. I want my talents, as small as they may be, to count for something.
Don’t wait for tragedy to strike someone you know. Get up and make a difference. The reward and satisfaction you earn is immeasurable. But the benefit you provide is quantifiable. And the hope you see in the eyes of a child fighting so great a battle will forever etch in your heart a desire to give, help and hold.
Nathan Shull is a 35-year-old finance junior from Seattle. Follow him on Twitter @TDR_nshull
Contact Nathan Shull at [email protected]