(Read to the tune of “The 12 Days of Christmas.” Yes, you may have to stretch some of the lines to fit the tune.)
On the first day of budget cuts, LSU gave to me: a worthless B.S. degree.
On the second day of budget cuts, LSU gave to me: two banned chants and a worthless B.S. degree.
On the third day of budget cuts, LSU gave to me: a giant Quad flashmob, two banned chants and a worthless B.S. degree.
On the fourth day of budget cuts, LSU gave to me: four axed languages, a giant Quad flashmob, two banned chants and a worthless B.S. degree.
On the fifth day of budget cuts, LSU gave to me: “Love Purple, Live Gold,” four axed languages, a giant Quad flashmob, two banned chants and a worthless B.S. degree.
On the sixth day of budget cuts, LSU gave to me: even less parking, “Love Purple, Live Gold,” four axed languages, a giant Quad flashmob, two banned chants and a worthless B.S. degree.
On the seventh day of budget cuts, LSU gave to me: more road construction, even less parking, “Love Purple, Live Gold,” four axed languages, a giant Quad flashmob, two banned chants and a worthless B.S. degree.
On the eighth day of budget cuts, LSU gave to me: inflated parking tickets, more road construction, even less parking, “Love Purple, Live Gold,” four axed languages, a giant Quad flashmob, two banned chants and a worthless B.S. degree.
On the ninth day of budget cuts, LSU gave to me: nine daily broadcast e-mails, inflated parking tickets, more road construction, even less parking, “Love Purple, Live Gold,” four axed languages, a giant Quad flashmob, two banned chants and a worthless B.S. degree.
On the 10th day of budget cuts, LSU gave to me: a 10-win football team, nine daily broadcast e-mails. inflated parking tickets, more road construction, even less parking, “Love Purple, Live Gold,” four axed languages, a giant Quad flashmob, two banned chants and a worthless B.S. degree.
On the 11th day of budget cuts, LSU gave to me: a grass-eating head coach, a 10-win football team, nine daily broadcast e-mails, inflated parking tickets, more road construction, even less parking, “Love Purple, Live Gold,” four axed languages, a giant Quad flashmob, two banned chants and a worthless B.S. degree.
On the 12th day of budget cuts, LSU gave to me: loaded glory holes, a grass-eating head coach, a 10-win football team, nine daily broadcast e-mails, inflated parking tickets, more road construction, even less parking, “Love Purple, Live Gold,” four axed languages, a giant Quad flashmob, two banned chants and a worthless B.S.. degree.
Merry Christmas, everyone. Study hard, be safe and enjoy your holiday break.
Adam Arinder is a 21-year-old communication studies senior from Baton Rouge. Follow him on Twitter @TDR_Aarinder.
 
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Contact Adam Arinder at [email protected]