Let me tell you about the time my girlfriend cheated on me. I want to apologize beforehand, but for her sake and mine, I’m going to be sketchy with some of the details. You understand. Anyway, on with the story.
My girlfriend — let’s just call her Jessica, for privacy’s sake — and I had been going out for awhile, and I assumed everything was fine. Things were going well between us — we got along nicely, and we had a certain chemistry that really impressed me at the time.
I was 22 years old and finishing up my Bachelor’s degree at Louisiana Tech University in Ruston, and she was 19 years old and sitting out her first semester of college because she was volunteering at my hometown elementary school in Jonesville, LA.
So every weekend, I made the two-hour drive from Ruston back to Jonesville so I could see my lovely Jessica. We had fun together, we hung out a lot on the weekends, and I thought this had the chance of becoming a serious relationship.
My family liked her, and so did I.
Anyway, long story short, a long-time friend told me he saw Jessica riding through town all hugged up with her ex-boyfriend.
Needless to say, I was crushed.
I wanted to get to the bottom of the story, so I called her, and sure enough she told me she had just recently begun “seeing” her ex-boyfriend behind my back, while I was away at college during the week.
Jessica gave me the usual spiel — she was sorry, she wanted to work it out but she had feelings for both me and her ex-boyfriend — you know, all that crap.
So I made the decision easy for her — I walked away. I walked away for good. That happened four years ago, and I haven’t spoken to her since.
Stories like mine, unfortunately, are not rare. Apparently infidelity rears its ugly head in a lot of relationships.
In fact, in today’s society, infidelity has become almost commonplace–a given in some relationships.
According to research done on a CNN special titled “Infidelity,” 90 percent of the population agrees that infidelity is wrong, but a staggering number of men and women continue to cheat on their spouses.
Dr. Shirley Glass, the well-known “godmother of infidelity research,” broke these statistics down in the CNN special and determined that roughly 25 percent of women and 45 percent of men cheat on their spouses.
Glass, however, contends that the 20-percent gap is closing, and women are rapidly catching up with men in regards to cheating.
Putting percentages and polls aside, larger questions remains unanswered: When did infidelity become acceptable behavior? Should cheating be regarded as a normal part of a relationship? Is monogamy a myth and practiced only by odd people who don’t operate in normal society?
Call me old-fashioned, but I believe the answers to these questions are a resounding “never,” “no” and “no,” respectively.
Infidelity is wrong, no matter what kind of spin or rationalization a person might try to put on the situation.
Relationships — and I mean real, mature relationships — are based on love, trust, honesty and loyalty. These qualities are not far-reaching, unattainable standards. They are the foundation of any committed relationship.
According to statistics and personal experience, infidelity is turning into the norm of modern relationships, and the prevailing attitudes of some couples seems not to be if his or her partner will cheat but when.
Yeah, relationships are hard, and sometimes remaining faithful to your partner is challenging. But God gave us all a conscience and an inborn set of morals, and that’s what separates us from the animals.
We all should take a step back and realize that men and women are not a bunch of instinct-driven creatures who should just give in to any and all animalistic desires. We have the ability to choose right from wrong, and that should be the norm of our society — deciphering good from bad and choosing to do the right thing. And doing the right thing means never allowing infidelity to betray the love you share with your partner.
Infidelity too common
February 11, 2004