After a busy school week, heavy workload and one task after the other, I enjoy resetting my social battery with a little crash-out session in the privacy of my home. Just kidding, that’s not what I was going to say, I reset with solitude.
I relish having a day or two to myself.
For those who know I love to engage in a good chat, this may be hard to believe, but sometimes I’d rather not talk at all.
Ahhh, silence–pure bliss.
While I value having a community of people I can enjoy life with, whether we’re making a quick stop at Trader Joe’s or sitting on my couch watching “The Summer I Turned Pretty” I also embrace my solo time.
Alongside classes, my first week back to school was spent shopping, going on dinner and movie dates as well as coffee runs with my top five contacts. I look forward to sharing both significant and trivial moments with friends; however, there is something beautiful and profound about having time for oneself.
Let’s face it, some things in life are meant to be done alone. Cracking open the pages of the novel that’s collecting dust on your coffee table, organizing your closet, Swiffering your apartment floors, putting your hair in rollers, updating your LinkedIn profile, are all things most of us prefer to do solo.
The idea of being left alone with one’s own thoughts is some people’s biggest fear. However, it’s important to know how to live life without the curse of codependency.
Society and the media have painted a false narrative, trying to brainwash many to think, “If you’re alone then you’re a loser” and that’s far from the truth.
Picture this: it’s Friday night, you turn on your favorite rom-com and the first 10 minutes of the movie show a singleton coming home from their perfect job to their perfect SoHo loft, trading their jeans for sweatpants and finding the perfect Pinot to accompany the takeout waiting for them on their coffee table. And might I add, this character looks hot enough to be, oh, I don’t know, a model, but they really work some corporate job or run a quirky bookstore.
As viewers, are we supposed to be sad for this character? Should we pity their peace and their million-dollar digs?
If you ask me, that’s a night well spent. Throw in a lavender bubble bath and a pint of ice cream and I’m in.
You can be alone happily without being perceived as a social pariah. I can’t tell you the amount of times I’ve been on campus and witnessed people casting looks of pity to the guy doing work by himself with a laptop open. News flash, he’s not wearing a sign that reads, “I have zero friends.” To me, he looks like he’s handling his business while unbothered and unfazed by your judgment.
When you see someone alone on campus, you shouldn’t jump to the conclusion that they’re asocial or antisocial. Being alone is sometimes intentional. Stop labeling people as outcasts because they’re alone in public, minding their business.
And to the person reading this who just may indeed be in a friend drought but still choosing to live, love, laugh–good for you. You should know you’re brave and really cool for not letting anything or anyone stop you from going on solo dates and treating yourself well.
Sometimes it’s better to be alone and happy than to be surrounded by people and miserable. Being alone doesn’t necessarily mean you’re lonely.
Embrace the moments you do have alone, take in the stillness, learn to love your own company. The truth is, a person who enjoys their own company is the best kind of company.
Until we meet again, I have dinner plans: “Table for one, please.”
Ava Francis is a 22-year-old journalism major from New Orleans.
